02/15/2011
Day after Valentine's Day... I sure hope your day was better than mine.... Last week Eric made a comment about not screwing up when Valentine's day is... Fast Forward... Valentine's Day comes and I sit at the house all day just incase my dear husband sends me something from overseas... I watch on Facebook as my friends keep posting pictures of the beautiful bouquets of flowers they are getting... Awww so sweet!!! One comment on one post says 'Now that is real love, when your husband takes time out of his day in Iraq to send his beautiful wife beautiful flowers!' Wow... that is so cool... I am so excited to see what my wonderful husband is sending me....
Back to today.... Nothing! I went to bed so upset last night, hurt that my husband didn't send me something... So mad I was having bad dreams about us fighting over his lack of caring...So I get up this morning after having one of the worst nights of sleep since he left... Turn on the computer, turn on Skype, and wait for him to log on....
Finally he gets on and in a very calm voice after the hellos and I love yous... I say to him... 'Just wondering if you sent me something for Valentine's Day, because nothing showed up...', Just hoping maybe it just didn't get delivered.... His answer... No, Just didn't think about it. Wow... It took everything I had not to burst into tears at that moment... I get it, he's overseas... I shouldn't be so petty and be upset because my husband of almost 17 years didn't sent me a Valentine... But you know what... I am sad... I am petty... and I am pissed that he had no trouble spending $120 on a hard drive for his computer but couldn't buy me a Valentine. Does that make me a bad wife? I don't think so! I think any woman would be hurt no matter where their husband is... And I'm not gonna feel sorry for him for 'not thinking about it'... It hurt so bad... It felt like he was saying to me... No, Just didn't think about YOU!
Now if something shows up it just won't mean the same... It will be an I'm sorry gift instead of an I love you one... Like I've said before... Whatcha gonna do? I've tried for 17 years to get this man to take a hint and remember days like Valentine's day is something special to a girl... Maybe its my fault for expecting him to change and just get it... finally!
I hope everyone else's Valentines Day was a lot happier then mine!
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
2/05/11 - 2/11/2011
02/07/2011
The past few days have been up and down. On the 5th, half of my heart left me for a year! I've been trying to keep it together so Zack doesn't see me get upset but not sure how much longer that will work. For anyone who has loved someone with everything that they are, it is the hardest thing ever to watch them walk away from you! Zack and I did very good, standing there watching Eric grab his bags and get on that bus. I was especially proud of how Zack took it. We spent the afternoon at home, just the 2 of us doing absolutely nothing. Sunday, we did get out of the house for a few hours and went to a friend's house and enjoyed the afternoon with them. Had a good time watching the football game and enjoying some food!
Today it was back to business. Got up and got Zack off to school. Worked on the house for a bit and then tonight again the loneliness starts to creep in. I seriously need to stop listening to my play list when I am sitting on my computer... I seem to like Love songs... And at a time like this, they are all depressing! Maybe I will make a new play list for computer time...
Also this weekend my family lost someone. My uncle Bill passed away during the night Saturday night. I feel so bad that I am so far away and can't be there with my family. One of my best friends growing up was my cousin, Shelley. I haven't seen her in years... Now only through Facebook. She drove back to Idaho when her dad started having strokes last week and got there in time to say good bye to him. I so wish I could be there with her... and for my dad, who lost his brother. At these times is when I hate being so far away. It scares me to think that if something were to happen to my parents or brothers/sister that I would not be able to get back home. These are some of the issues we deal with on a daily basis... serving our country!
Today I also started on the path to a life change! Not sure if I mentioned before but Eric bought me a recumbent bike and treadmill before he left. My plan is to loose much needed weight and start taking care of myself. Well, today was my first day monitoring my caloric intake... I started seeing a nutritionist and she gave me a 1800 calorie a day limit... Not sure if I did something wrong but I wrote down everything I ate today and mine only came to 1250. Does that mean I'm supposed to eat more? Tomorrow I have plans to go to the shoe store and get myself some athletic shoes... The ones I have just don't work on the treadmill or the bike. I also have to make up a chart to keep track of my mileage on the treadmill and bike. I want to walk the distance to Eric over the next year... Thats over 4000 miles! Wish me luck on that one... Right now I'd be happy if I could walk more than a mile at a time!!!
Off to bed now! I hope everyone has a great week!!
Side note... Eric if you are reading this.... I love you and miss you and please come home to me soon!!!
02/09/2011
Today was such a great day!!! Got up and turned on the computer and Eric was on Skype waiting for Zack and I... It made the whole day just go by so great... I was on such an emotional high all day I decided to make the most of it.
After dropping Zack off at school, I decided to head into town and check out the 'Mall' we have here... Not much of a mall... more like a hall with about 20 (if that) stores in it... No food court to speak of really... There was a little place and I noticed they sold smoothies... may have to go back during the summer! But I did find a Payless shoe store in there and was able to buy myself some nice walking shoes... toning and firming too! Always a plus to tone and firm!! haha Ended up walking the mall and found a Game stop so I went in and bought Zack a couple PS3 games... Then headed over to the Salon at Walmart... I know, but I like them and they do good work on my hair... I learned a long time ago, its not how much you pay, but who you are paying! I decided that I was tired of my mousy looking hair so I went in to get some highlights. The girl that did my hair did a great job, but I think when I go back I'm gonna have them go even lighter. I wanted subtle but noticeable... It is noticeable but not that noticeable. I need to find that happy medium...
After leaving Walmart, I finally made it home in time to go get Zack from school. It was just an all around great day and I feel like I got so much accomplished outside of the house... Hopefully Eric will be on the computer in the morning again and tomorrow I will get accomplished here at the house... Really need to do the dishes and fold the laundry... haha!!!
Hope you have a great night and an even better day tomorrow!!
The past few days have been up and down. On the 5th, half of my heart left me for a year! I've been trying to keep it together so Zack doesn't see me get upset but not sure how much longer that will work. For anyone who has loved someone with everything that they are, it is the hardest thing ever to watch them walk away from you! Zack and I did very good, standing there watching Eric grab his bags and get on that bus. I was especially proud of how Zack took it. We spent the afternoon at home, just the 2 of us doing absolutely nothing. Sunday, we did get out of the house for a few hours and went to a friend's house and enjoyed the afternoon with them. Had a good time watching the football game and enjoying some food!
Today it was back to business. Got up and got Zack off to school. Worked on the house for a bit and then tonight again the loneliness starts to creep in. I seriously need to stop listening to my play list when I am sitting on my computer... I seem to like Love songs... And at a time like this, they are all depressing! Maybe I will make a new play list for computer time...
Also this weekend my family lost someone. My uncle Bill passed away during the night Saturday night. I feel so bad that I am so far away and can't be there with my family. One of my best friends growing up was my cousin, Shelley. I haven't seen her in years... Now only through Facebook. She drove back to Idaho when her dad started having strokes last week and got there in time to say good bye to him. I so wish I could be there with her... and for my dad, who lost his brother. At these times is when I hate being so far away. It scares me to think that if something were to happen to my parents or brothers/sister that I would not be able to get back home. These are some of the issues we deal with on a daily basis... serving our country!
Today I also started on the path to a life change! Not sure if I mentioned before but Eric bought me a recumbent bike and treadmill before he left. My plan is to loose much needed weight and start taking care of myself. Well, today was my first day monitoring my caloric intake... I started seeing a nutritionist and she gave me a 1800 calorie a day limit... Not sure if I did something wrong but I wrote down everything I ate today and mine only came to 1250. Does that mean I'm supposed to eat more? Tomorrow I have plans to go to the shoe store and get myself some athletic shoes... The ones I have just don't work on the treadmill or the bike. I also have to make up a chart to keep track of my mileage on the treadmill and bike. I want to walk the distance to Eric over the next year... Thats over 4000 miles! Wish me luck on that one... Right now I'd be happy if I could walk more than a mile at a time!!!
Off to bed now! I hope everyone has a great week!!
Side note... Eric if you are reading this.... I love you and miss you and please come home to me soon!!!
02/09/2011
Today was such a great day!!! Got up and turned on the computer and Eric was on Skype waiting for Zack and I... It made the whole day just go by so great... I was on such an emotional high all day I decided to make the most of it.
After dropping Zack off at school, I decided to head into town and check out the 'Mall' we have here... Not much of a mall... more like a hall with about 20 (if that) stores in it... No food court to speak of really... There was a little place and I noticed they sold smoothies... may have to go back during the summer! But I did find a Payless shoe store in there and was able to buy myself some nice walking shoes... toning and firming too! Always a plus to tone and firm!! haha Ended up walking the mall and found a Game stop so I went in and bought Zack a couple PS3 games... Then headed over to the Salon at Walmart... I know, but I like them and they do good work on my hair... I learned a long time ago, its not how much you pay, but who you are paying! I decided that I was tired of my mousy looking hair so I went in to get some highlights. The girl that did my hair did a great job, but I think when I go back I'm gonna have them go even lighter. I wanted subtle but noticeable... It is noticeable but not that noticeable. I need to find that happy medium...
After leaving Walmart, I finally made it home in time to go get Zack from school. It was just an all around great day and I feel like I got so much accomplished outside of the house... Hopefully Eric will be on the computer in the morning again and tomorrow I will get accomplished here at the house... Really need to do the dishes and fold the laundry... haha!!!
Hope you have a great night and an even better day tomorrow!!
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
1/29/11 - 2/4/11
1/31/2011
Hello my friends! Today is a day of mixed emotions... I am so thankful that I have one more day with my wonderful husband, Eric... And at the same time I am so sad because I know our days are limited...
Today started out normal... Zack off to school and Eric and I vegging around the house. I have to say its been so nice having him home with me these past couple of weeks. He had to leave for a bit in the morning to do a send off to some of our soldiers who had to leave today on their flight to Iraq. Safe travels to all our friends who had to leave today! After Eric got home, we fixed ourselves some breakfast and just started to lay around and be bored. One advantage we have of living in Alaska is when our pay hits our bank, which is in the south, it is still early in the day here!! Woo hoo!! Eric said we could go shopping!
Eric and I drove over to Sports Authority to check out the prices on a recumbent bike... I want one to start my exercise regiment! And it was such a great surprise when we got there and one of the bikes was on sale for $249... Thats a whole $200 cheaper then the P/X we had priced a few weeks ago... Needless to say it was loaded into the trunk of the car!! Then we went to a used store called Used a Bit... Very cute... bought Zack some books. He is doing so good with his reading!! I am so proud of him and have no problem buying him books!
Anyway, after we got Zack we went to the grocery store... got the usual... milk, bread, cereal... couldn't decide what to have for dinner... Then Zack says we should have Chinese... Well... There you go!! We had a nice dinner at our favorite Chinese Buffet. Before we went, Eric and Zack were upstairs in the spare bedroom... we are turning it into the home gym... So excited for that!! Tomorrow Eric says we can go back and get a treadmill they have on sale for $299... Can't beat that!!! I get to spend tonight working up a chart... When Eric leaves he will be 4023 miles from me... So I've decided over the next year I am going to walk to him... That means that I need to average 15 miles a day on my treadmill... Gonna be hard to start off but I think as time and the weight go by and bye... I can get it done!! Fingers crossed!!!
Well, tomorrow starts the first day of my new life and lifestyle as far as my weight... Going in for my first weigh in with a nutritionist... Fingers crossed it won't be too bad!!! Hope you all have a great night and an even better day!!
2/2/11
What a fantastic day I had today... My dear husband let me sleep in until 10 am this morning... It felt so good. Haven't been getting too much sleep lately... I think its nerves and stress from Eric leaving... Doing my best enjoying every minute I have with him right now!
We spent the morning emptying out some boxes and moving some stuff around and then he took me to lunch and to Barnes and Noble... I actually took him to Barnes and Noble, but I walked out with 3 new books and him nothing... He then brought me home and went to pick Zack up from school... I wasn't feeling very well so wanted to sit down and relax for a bit. And it was nice and quiet... Then Zack came home... Good thing I was awake to catch the book bag flying at my head when he walked in the door...
We had a good time going over to some friend's house for a bit... Just moved unto base so we went to find their house... Zack and I were invited over next Sunday to watch the Super Bowl game with them... I do believe we will be going! I like football and will give us a chance to get out of the house so soon after Eric leaves!
We then took Eric out to dinner... Wanted him to choose someplace he wanted to eat... anywhere at all... He picked Big Daddy's BBQ... Do you watch Food Network? Guy Fieri and Diners, Drive Ins and Dives?... Well, if you don't you should, then you could see the good yummy food they serve... It was so good and I was a good girl and ate my side salad first and ordered the chicken plate... and then only ate half of the breast that they gave me and gave my wing to Eric...
It was a very good day! I love days like this... Days where you can just have a good time, even if your sitting in the quiet enjoying each other! I can't wait for him to get back home where he belongs!!!
Night all!
Hello my friends! Today is a day of mixed emotions... I am so thankful that I have one more day with my wonderful husband, Eric... And at the same time I am so sad because I know our days are limited...
Today started out normal... Zack off to school and Eric and I vegging around the house. I have to say its been so nice having him home with me these past couple of weeks. He had to leave for a bit in the morning to do a send off to some of our soldiers who had to leave today on their flight to Iraq. Safe travels to all our friends who had to leave today! After Eric got home, we fixed ourselves some breakfast and just started to lay around and be bored. One advantage we have of living in Alaska is when our pay hits our bank, which is in the south, it is still early in the day here!! Woo hoo!! Eric said we could go shopping!
Eric and I drove over to Sports Authority to check out the prices on a recumbent bike... I want one to start my exercise regiment! And it was such a great surprise when we got there and one of the bikes was on sale for $249... Thats a whole $200 cheaper then the P/X we had priced a few weeks ago... Needless to say it was loaded into the trunk of the car!! Then we went to a used store called Used a Bit... Very cute... bought Zack some books. He is doing so good with his reading!! I am so proud of him and have no problem buying him books!
Anyway, after we got Zack we went to the grocery store... got the usual... milk, bread, cereal... couldn't decide what to have for dinner... Then Zack says we should have Chinese... Well... There you go!! We had a nice dinner at our favorite Chinese Buffet. Before we went, Eric and Zack were upstairs in the spare bedroom... we are turning it into the home gym... So excited for that!! Tomorrow Eric says we can go back and get a treadmill they have on sale for $299... Can't beat that!!! I get to spend tonight working up a chart... When Eric leaves he will be 4023 miles from me... So I've decided over the next year I am going to walk to him... That means that I need to average 15 miles a day on my treadmill... Gonna be hard to start off but I think as time and the weight go by and bye... I can get it done!! Fingers crossed!!!
Well, tomorrow starts the first day of my new life and lifestyle as far as my weight... Going in for my first weigh in with a nutritionist... Fingers crossed it won't be too bad!!! Hope you all have a great night and an even better day!!
2/2/11
What a fantastic day I had today... My dear husband let me sleep in until 10 am this morning... It felt so good. Haven't been getting too much sleep lately... I think its nerves and stress from Eric leaving... Doing my best enjoying every minute I have with him right now!
We spent the morning emptying out some boxes and moving some stuff around and then he took me to lunch and to Barnes and Noble... I actually took him to Barnes and Noble, but I walked out with 3 new books and him nothing... He then brought me home and went to pick Zack up from school... I wasn't feeling very well so wanted to sit down and relax for a bit. And it was nice and quiet... Then Zack came home... Good thing I was awake to catch the book bag flying at my head when he walked in the door...
We had a good time going over to some friend's house for a bit... Just moved unto base so we went to find their house... Zack and I were invited over next Sunday to watch the Super Bowl game with them... I do believe we will be going! I like football and will give us a chance to get out of the house so soon after Eric leaves!
We then took Eric out to dinner... Wanted him to choose someplace he wanted to eat... anywhere at all... He picked Big Daddy's BBQ... Do you watch Food Network? Guy Fieri and Diners, Drive Ins and Dives?... Well, if you don't you should, then you could see the good yummy food they serve... It was so good and I was a good girl and ate my side salad first and ordered the chicken plate... and then only ate half of the breast that they gave me and gave my wing to Eric...
It was a very good day! I love days like this... Days where you can just have a good time, even if your sitting in the quiet enjoying each other! I can't wait for him to get back home where he belongs!!!
Night all!
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